“He dresses like a slob.”
“She didn’t let me get a word in edgewise.”
SOS has helped countless singles learn the skills they need to present themselves favorably – and find shidduchim!
Call SOS if your shidduch - age child:
2. Has poor body language – slumps
3. droops shoulders
4. displays negative emotion too obviously
5. Can’t interpret body language in others
6. Has an anger problem
7. Has poor self esteem
8. Has difficulty making commitments
9. Has other social issues
For some young men and women, dating can be torture. Some young adults have no idea how to navigate an encounter with a stranger, especially someone of the opposite sex. They freeze up and their minds go blank. Their social anxiety inhibits them from doing little more than responding to questions in barely audible monosyllables, never meeting the other person's eyes.
Girls with these deficits come away from almost every date feeling deflated, dispirited and ashamed. Then comes the call from the shadchan, twisting the knife. Repeated experiences of this sort shatter self-esteem, giving rise to feelings of being unwanted, unworthy and out-of-sync with society.
The challenges of marrying off young women in the frum community today are difficult enough under the best of circumstances. Social skills deficits limit a girl's (and boy’s) opportunities considerably. What can be done to alleviate this hardship?
Most experts agree that with specialized coaching, a person's social “intelligence” and self-esteem can be significantly raised. Even those who habitually miss social cues, and have difficulty making a favorable impression in social encounters, can learn how to relate to and connect with a new acquaintance. They can acquire the skills of reading facial expression and body language cues; maintaining eye contact; injecting interest and empathy into one's conversation--and many other important social skills.
Raising a person's social IQ and other forms of social skills coaching is far from an instantaneous, magical cure-all. It is a process not much different from other forms of “therapy,” requiring consistent training and practice.